Hubby says feeling like I’m faking isn’t faking 10

Today ended up being a rest day, even though I did have agility class tonight.  I was just too unwell to attend.

Last night I started having some pretty serious suicidal thoughts.  Luckily I didn’t dream about suicide!  When I woke up in the morning, I was still not doing well.

In addition to the strong suicidal urges, I was also suffering from imposter syndrome.  In other words, I was feeling like I was faking being so badly off.  I couldn’t really be that badly off, could I?  I’ve been doing so well recently.  So I was doubting my suicidal thoughts in addition to having strong urges.  Talk about no self esteem!

Luckily the pups have been helping me all day.  They’ve been taking turns cuddling with me on the couch, which has been nice.  Although in an attempt to get closer to me, Ollie’s freshly cut toenail ripped my skin right next to my crotch!  Ouchie!  Good thing I don’t wear pants!

Hestia really likes sitting on Brad’s footrest and watching me closely.  When I’m having a particularly hard time she comes over to me, then when I’m doing a little better she goes back to Brad’s footrest and gives me the googley eyes.

In an effort to cheer me up some, Brad took some photographs of the doggies helping me.  Here they are:

Black and white picture of a concerned, unhappy, and anxious Veronica holding Hestia to her chest and in front of half of her face.

Color picture including Ollie’s back as he licks Veronica’s leg. There is a Japanese Chin pillow behind everyone.

Desaturated picture almost the same as the last one, except Hestia is looking at the camera.

Black and white picture with violet tint, much the same as others, except you can see Ollie’s face and tongue as he licks my leg.